Someone I Can't Call Mine

I have swung back and forth, wondering
Whether to hold on still or just let go
What we have is like an endless tunnel
Where it leads us is a blur, I really don't know

The waiting is absolutely tormenting.
It made me question love.
Ambivalent feeling, wishful thinking,
Waiting at the end of the crossroad,
Waiting, just waiting.

I've heard your voice over and over.
Then a glimpse of you made me want to stay longer.
Craving for you, impeccable love this is or so
Though the possibility of us clearly is vague,
We're a "yes" yet a "no."

There's no use of escaping the you and me, not "us."
Tried to hide the love with loathing and hate
But every time I stay away careful and slow,
I'd recoil back to you so fast—too fast I can't go.

So I told myself, I surrender to love.
I'll just let it all hang out, no ifs, no buts,
Because love is anything you can't understand.
But I'll keep on wishing that someday we'll both find the answers
With your hand in my hand

They say don't let go of someone who
Makes you feel surreal, someone who
Makes you smile unknowingly, and who
Makes you want to stay even if there are no other reasons for you to.

If It's Not Love, What Could It Be

They said it's not love.

But if it isn't love,
Why does it hurt so bad?
Why is it so painful?
Why am I still willing to wait?
Is it still infatuation?

When I know that it kills me yet I'm still hoping and fighting,
Even if I know that you'll be forever blind with my love.

I understand,
It isn't easy for me.
It will never be easy,
Never be easy for anyone.

Everything makes me think of you.
That's hard because I know
That I never entered your mind even for a second.
But I still hope that someday, even it it's not today,
I hope that someday you'll give me a chance.

Give me the chance to love you,
To love you endlessly and unconditionally.
But why is life so complicated?
Why can't we just loved back by the one we love?
Why can't we be happy with the one we love?

Although, I'm still happy,
Still happy knowing that you exist,
Knowing you're happy even if it's with somebody else.
I can wait, even if it will take forever.